Worthwhile Arguments

So I was thinking about it the other day and it seems to me that people expect to argue.... and to go above that, they actually want to argue. I live in a familiy that argues all the time and to be honest I am soooo glad to not really have that issue with Nicki. We've talked about it a few times and we agree that an argument is enevitable but we haven't really yet. There are those times (yup you guessed it... once a month... lol) that she may be on edge, or me for that matter (get grouchy when tired) -- however, pretty much unscathed in my book. Since I have grown up with arguing and spent a very long relationship mostly arguing I can say that the last two months of relative calm have been supreme. I don't miss it one bit. Now, time to delve into arguments more.

The most commonly used definition of an argument is "A discussion in which disagreement is expressed; a debate; A quarrel; a dispute." Quarrel being the key word here. Why is it that we sometimes just enjoy quarrelling? Why do we expect to do so? I theorize that many of us are basically programmed (especially in the U.S.) that quarrel and competition are the only way in life. Happiness through the defeat of your foes! #2 is first place LOSER right? I've been fighting with my sis & other family members in the last couple weeks and you now what I have gotten out of it? Nothing good... only stress with makes me unhappy. There were several weeks before that in which I didn't fight or complain or argue and it was great.

So when there is a couple that "never" argues they are looked at oddly - as if there is something wrong with them. I've gone from a relationship that argued all the time to one that doesn't and while it does seem "odd" I am perfectly happy with it. There is no harm in discussing issues at hand or putting forth you point of view but why take it to the argument level? There are so many things in life that just arn't worth getting worked up about. Perhaps a good quote is, " “The best thing for an argument is not words and ideas, but to stop arguing”